For friendship no dating
Romans 13:8-14 calls us to love others, to work for their souls' good rather than looking to please ourselves.
More specifically, verse 10 reminds us that "[l]ove does no harm to its neighbor." Romans 14:1-15:7 offers a discourse on favoring weaker brothers and sisters above ourselves, valuing and encouraging that which is good in the souls of others.
So is the trend toward intimate friendships between single men and women a good thing? If you haven't read my previous articles on biblical dating, you'll be helped in thinking through this issue by reading "Biblical Dating: How It's Different From Modern Dating." Based on some of the principles found there, let me offer a couple of practical reasons why I believe such friendships to be generally unwise, and then I'll suggest a positive role for friendship among singles in the Christian community.
In this series of articles, I've raised several biblical principles regarding the way we should treat our brothers and sisters in Christ.
As I've discussed before, a broad (but sound) implication of this passage is that "defrauding" could include inappropriate emotional — as well as physical — intimacy.You probably won’t remember the moment you ‘decided’ to become friends, because it didn’t involve a conscious choice at all. Perhaps you find yourself living in a new city, miles away from your old gang, and suddenly your diary looks frighteningly empty every weekend, and you realise that you’re going to have to take decisive action if you don’t want to drown in all that blank space.Or maybe you end up in random conversation at a party with a woman you’ve never met before, a woman who seems kind and cool and wise and funny, and is wearing great shoes, and you walk away thinking in a small, playground voice: “But one way of securing a new pal might be the concept of 'friend dating'.Basically, the question seems to be how exactly single Christians should relate to members of the opposite sex in that large and awkward zone between "we've never met" and a deliberate dating or courting relationship. I won't repeat the full history lesson here, as several Boundless authors have already discussed it (Joshua Rogers most recently, in his excellent piece "Your Friendgirl Deserves Better").Essentially, the historical reality is that until 30 or 40 years ago, long, intimate friendships between men and women in which each served as the other's emotional confidante, relationship adviser and "best buddy" were far less common than they are today.
He’s merely accepting friendship, in lieu of dating you, because it beats the alternative. Having no girl friends, and, therefore, no one to confide in.